Thursday, April 10, 2008

This is why I don't try new things.

I'm coming back to the apartment downtown. Upon reaching Fullerton, my coffee (my second coffee) is gone, so I duck into Dominick's to grab something to drink. I instinctively walk to the pop isle, and see that Gatorade suddenly has it's own hugeass section. In the middle this catches my eye...

Now, I'm a big fan of Gatorade, and the idea of a morning drink without caffeine and guarana and all that stuff you really shouldn't be pumping into yourself as an alternative to actually walking up is intriguing to me. There were two flavors, the other said "artifically flavored" and this one said "naturally flavored," so I grabbed one. I get home and pop it open.

This thing isn't good. It's not bad, either. It's... despicable. I think this is how I would feel if somebody kicked my dog on a relative's grave. It's like the drink enters my mouth and says "DIE YOU ASSHOLE" and proceeds to kick the shit out of my tastebuds. It tastes like liquefied Sweettarts mixed with pure fucking hatred.


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